Dear Jon (Stewart)...

We love you, we always loved you, we love you even more now that you're embracing facial hair (even if in part, Go Beard or Go Home!)... but Jon... as we've noted, by way (THE) Jack Passion's bearding philosophy... Beardos need not explain their beards, nor reasoning for wearing a beard... a beard chooses you Jon, not the other way around.

That said, Jon's explanation as to why he went bearded is pretty funny:

"The truth is I'm a Japanese snow monkey. I've been hiding that from people and I can't live that lie anymore."

But... to his credit, Jon did indeed take "beard rubbing" to the next level this week, when he and Wyatt Cenac engaged in the act on 7/26... I consider this my Birthday present, thanks Jon.