burns

3rd Annual Coney Island BMC Wrap Up

As you know by now (given the myriad of live postings and up to the minute results updates), El Beardo went to the 3rd Annual Coney Island Beard and Moustache Competition... presented by the lovely Joanna Firneno and the curly Donny Vomit.

Unfortunately, because my suit was at the cleaners, my suspenders lost and the briefcase back in my father in-law's possession... I was unable, or unwilling, to compete my Championship Corporate Beard. Regardless what follows is a complete recounting -- to the best of my ability, given the copious amounts of beer that surrounded the event -- of the festivities, the beardos, the staches, and overall hairy awesomeness that last night's party down on the shore came to be... and what an event it was!

 

What really warmed our heart was the 'show must go on' perspective of the organizers, competitors and judges... there were ample hiccups (4 total competitors for natural mustache? no problem, we'll make do), issues regarding facial hair standards (OH: "well that's what happens when your categories have no concrete standards, they are learning as they go...") and so on... but not to be fazed, Donny and his motley crew of characters (which also included Cowboy and World Champion Trick Roper, Chris McDaniel; Jennifer Miller, The Lady with a Beard; and sword swallower Heather Holliday).

All in all, I really enjoyed the raw debauchery of said competition... it was a welcome break from the many rules, standards, and guidelines that we've heard and seen in other competitions, even the mostly freewheeling National's in Bend earlier this summer. However, the natural category winners were B-a-B friends from National's and Magnificent Specimens (i.e. returning champ Myk O'Connor), which  wholeheartedly  vindicated the results and gave full credence to the event in our books.

All in all, a great job done by all... especially the styles mustache category entrants... clearly, and by far, the most fully loaded category with nearly 15 contestants in the first round alone... the Hipster stache movement was and is alive and well by the beach in Brooklyn. So, without further ado... the select awesome photos from last night are below, other can be found in the Hairy Pics tab for your hair enjoyment.

Also check out the Competition's fan page on Facebook, goodies galore.


The Crowds, Setting and Judges

   

    

   

Natural Mustache Finalists


Natural Beard Finalists


Sideburns Finalists


Styled Mustache Finalists


Styled Beard Finalists


Fake Female Beard Finalists


THE WINNERS! (and judges)

Grooming 101, via Toot Joslin

So, I’m here and my envy is at about a 12 on a scale of 1-10... sure i've seen some massive beards and beardos in my tenure at B-a-B but the effect of seeing them in person delivers a knockout punch to my already fragile psyche.

That being said, everyone has been the nicest people ever, and welcoming at that. The town is great, the people are better, the beards are longer, and the mustaches are curlier.

To kick off the June 5th festivities, I joined a bunch of hairy folks for a much needed Beard styling seminar by the one and only partial beard champ himself, Toot Joslin at the Bond Street Barber Shop in downtown Bend.

Below are three videos that resulted from this enlightening session (apologies that it's indeed HD quality, so it'll take a while to load...). The first is a brief look at Toot, his personal and facial hair history… plus some focus on the products he uses. That is followed by a full styling video and finally a brief Q&A.

I gotta tell you all… one of the most valuable lessons I’ve ever observed… now to just grow out my burns to match Toot’s awesomeness.